It was romantic! It was sweet! I was 25 years younger, ok maybe 30, but it was wonderful! Well, maybe I didn’t ACTUALLY go on a date with Ryan Reynolds, but the dream was as real as any date I’ve ever been on. Let me start at the beginning….
It could have been that the night was a little uncomfortably warm. It might have been the taco meat mixed with dirty rice and cheese that I had for dinner. All I know for sure, is that it was a toss and turn kind of a night. After the alarm went off and I got up for my morning prayers, I heard my bed calling me back. It reminded me that I hadn’t been in it long enough or slept well enough to just call it good. I reset the alarm and promptly fell back to sleep. Deep sleep. Drooling on the pillow kind of sleep.
I was transported to another place, one I was not familiar with in any way. I don’t know if it was a mansion or an estate, but I was a guest at a very large residence with a Victorian style. It was Christmas and a late supper had been served. We were told that guests were invited to tour the many rooms, all beautifully decorated in themes for the holiday, and that dessert would be found in the form of cookies in each room. I was aware of these details in my dream, although I did not dream about the supper itself. I was dressed in an elegant gown, with my hair up and adorned with sparkly jewelry. I am almost positive that they were diamonds. Standing before a decorated tree in the foyer (if you say it like the French, it sounds so elegant!), I stared in wonder at the site of chandeliers and candles and lavish décor. I felt someone come up beside me and I turned. I looked up into the most beautiful eyes. There stood Ryan in a velvet suit, looking ever so handsome. He took my hand to be my escort on the tour. I could feel his admiringly warm gaze on me and when I would look at him, his cheeks would dimple with the most infectious smile.
We walked room to room, commenting on how each room seemed impossibly more beautiful than the last. We sampled cookies, talking about how scrumptious they looked and, giggling like children, deciding on small ones so that we could continue to sample. It was like walking on air, gliding across the marble floors, hearing the rustle of taffeta and carols softly played, but the only thing that wasn’t like a fantasy was the reality of his ever present warm touch on my gloved arm.
At one point, we stopped for a rest on upholstered sofas where others had gathered to do the same. Ryan put down the paper he’d been carrying and excused himself to retrieve us drinks. I picked the paper up and saw that it was full of entry forms to put in for drawings for some of the centerpieces and trees. I flipped it over and on the back, there was a note. It read, “ Dear Santa, I have met the most wonderful girl and would like nothing more than to win one of these beautiful trees for her, so that she can remember this night forever.” And he signed it like an autograph, Ryan K. Reynolds. I was so touched, so moved and with tears in my eyes, I sat back and smiled.
I heard a ringing. I smiled. I heard it again. I frowned. What was that? Then realizing it was my husband’s cell phone ringing in the kitchen, I bumped his arm and said, “Your phone is ringing”. He mumbled something and went out to retrieve it. I heard him talking and disappointingly assuming my dream was over, I laid there awake, still feeling the effects of the dream. Those feelings lasted well into the afternoon.
I know it sounds like a romance novel. I have no idea why Ryan Reynolds was the man in my dream considering our age difference and the fact that, when he was named Sexiest Man in People magazine, I was pretty blasé about it. No offense Ryan! I also have no idea what his middle initial is or why it was so important that it was included in his signature. That aside, why did I write this story? It comes down to this. Even as a woman in my, ahem, late 50’s, I still dream about romance. I still love the feeling it gives me. I remember when dating meant dating, not just hooking up. You went on a first date and if that wasn’t too awkward, you went on a second and if that seemed to go well, you went on a third. By that time, you start thinking there might be something serious happening here. In the meantime, he’s doing his best to impress you and you are just trying to come across as the woman of his dreams. Too often today, relationships are jump started with sex and we lose the romance and the getting to know one another parts. What happens when all of those so called little details do finally start emerging? Usually problems. You might find out that you don’t even really like each other. Sure, your partner may be great in bed, but considering the amount of your life spent out of the bed, it doesn’t even the scales. The sex might keep you holding on to the relationship that would have fallen apart otherwise. Many people tend to want the relationship to work out and move towards marriage. Some, see it as a ‘good’ situation, so why change it?
I am just a proponent for romance, dating, having fun together, “falling in love” and then moving forward, if your end goal is something permanent. If it’s not, then that’s up to you, but if you want something real and lasting, remember this: give your relationship the strong foundation of friendship before you start building something even more substantial. Let that friendship become a romance, and then become a committed relationship. The friendship will remain throughout and when the love is being questioned, go back to the friendship and build again. There’s always a place for bodice ripping, steamy love scenes and passion but… Here’s to romance!